5



Coffee

People love doing drugs. They feel nice, and don't believe your parents, they do make you look cool. Caffeine is a very tasty and beautiful drug. In fact, I'm using it as I type this review, and I feel hella good and very cool (kids take note).

But some people are afraid of caffeine because, believe it or not, more than 65% of Americans believe that their brain is "probably important," and some studies have shown caffeine users to show signs of addiction as well as withdrawal. For those people, I have only one thing to say: everybody's doing it, don't be such a fricken nerd.

Enough peer pressure though, onto the coffee. I generally drink two kinds of coffee: the stuff that I get at college which tastes like sour coal, and the stuff that my parents make at home which tastes like a bunch of impressive adjectives that a coffee connoisseur would say. I don't have much of a spectrum for coffee tasting, just those two points, but I would say that this coffee lands roughly 2/5 the way from the sour coal to the Barteau Blend™.

Not a bad brew to help wash down your A.M. Crunchwrap, plus it comes in a nice cardboard bilayer cup for insulation which keeps your hands cool and your brown juice hot.

5

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